Quote of the Day:
"I still love him." - Meagan McAllister, fiancee of Philip Markoff, the alleged "Craigslist Killer". Apparently she is ok with the robbing and murder of strippers.
Swine Flu!
by Conor Levis
The fast-spreading virus that is taking the world by storm. Health officials announced today that they aren't exactly ready to declare this a "pandemic", but the pandemic alert has been raised from a level 3 to a level 4. This means that it's just now been classified as a human-to-human transmitted virus that can cause community level outbreaks...as if we didn't already know this. I guess the whole thing with the hundreds of people dying in Mexico and the 64 cases here in the US wasn't enough evidence. Anyway, since this is a serious health concern, here are some fun facts about the swine flu.
- It really isn't even a "swine flu". The actual name of this virus is the H1N1. It's a new strain of type A influenza that derives from human influenza, avian influenza (bird flu), and two seperate strains of swine influenza. In other words...they've never seen anything like it before. I'm still going to call it swine flu though because it's fun to say.
-Swine flu is rare in humans because the virus rarely mutates into a form that passes through humans. That's why they are so baffled with this new outbreak.
-You can't actually get the swine flu from eating pork. At this point it's just something that is being transmitted by humans. Too bad nobody told Egypt before they slaughtered 300,000 pigs for precautionary measures. Poor piggies. Atleast we can take solace in the fact that they are probably considered martyrs over there and died noble deaths.
-Some of the suggested names thrown out there to rename this virus that have off the charts comedic value: "The Mexican Virus" (which of course Mexicans protested, those bastards), "Porkulosis", "The other White Flu", and then my personal favorite..."Bacon Lung"!
There really isn't much else to say. It's just a shame that this whole thing happened because Joakim Noah was having sex with pigs over in Mexico. Just a selfish act all around. All I know is if you haven't been feeling well lately, please stay the fuck away from me! Thanks.
"Desperate times call for desperate measures"A Series for the Ages
by Conor Levis
"Not again". Those were the words I uttered as I watched Ben Gordon hit a game-tying three with 9 seconds left in Game 4 on Sunday. The shot that forced double overtime. It was yet another clutch shot in what has already become a remarkable first round series. For anybody who watched the game, you know what happened next. That single basket sucked the life out of the Celtics and the Bulls ended up winning the game. At the time I was furious. I couldn't believe that a commanding 3-1 series lead for the Celtics could slip away just like that. I thought about what the team could have done better. Would the outcome have been different had Paul Pierce not missed a free throw? What if "Big Baby" Davis hadn't missed three easy layups? What happened to Rajon Rondo in the two overtime periods after playing so well for the first four quarters? I pondered these things over and over but after a while it didn't seem to matter anymore. Why? Because it was a great game. The more I thought about those things, the more I began to understand the greatness of what I was witnessing. Through four games in this first round series, there had already been 2 overtime games (one double overtime) and a game that was won with a last second shot in regulation...and we were still guarranteed atleast two more games!
By Monday morning, I couldn't wait to see what these two teams had in store for a pivotal Game 5 on Tuesday night. Boy, did they deliver. In another OT thriller the Celtics pulled out a 106-104 victory behind some late game heroics by the captain. With it, this officially became the greatest first round series in playoff history. It's had it all from thrilling games and clutch play...even a little controvery. You have subplots like how Kendrick Perkins has stepped up in the absence of Kevin Garnett, how Joakim Noah has established himself as the league's number 1 hustle guy/instigator for the next decade, how Ray Allen and Ben Gordon have shown they are cold-blooded assasins when it comes to making big shots. The best part of this series though is the emergence of two young point guards, Rajon Rondo and Derrick Rose. Rondo has been averaging a triple-double for the series with 24, 10, and 10. Derrick Rose tied an NBA record for points in a playoff debut and has been nothing short of spectacular all series long. Not only have they been the most important players on the floor for their respective teams, but we might also have an individual rivalry in the making for years to come. It's been a long time since we've seen two point guards go head to head at the level these two are playing at. It's been unbelievable to watch and has made this series THAT much better.
"Rondo and Rose could be a rivalry in the making"And of course, you can't say enough about Paul Pierce. He's been the team's best player and the most clutch performer all season long. Although he's looked sluggish at times, he came through when it mattered most in Game 5. With Ray Allen fouled out of the game, he put the team on his back like a true captain...and drained 4 straight jumpers in John Salmon's grill from the same exact spot. The Celtics will only go as far as Pierce takes them. This series is not over yet...even up 3 games to 2 against an inferior team. The way this series has gone, I'm prepared for anything. That's a good thing. Because we don't realize it now but we are watching history in the making. It's gonna be exciting to see how history will remember this epic first round matchup. I'm just happy to be a witness to it all.
"Pierce hit four of these jumpers to lead the Celtics to victory"
No comments:
Post a Comment